bras = authority

I was a bit nervous when you were born a girl. I've never been master of the whole feminine thing. I mean, I wear make-up, (most of the time) and I keep myself clean (most of the time), but I've never been that into all the muss and fuss it take to appear like a put together woman.

We'll see how you turn out, but I have a feeling you may be very girly, as a rebellion against my inabilities in this area. You're going to be wanting to wear designer this and low cut that.

I'm dreading talking about bras. I HATE bras. In my book, bras = authority, and I resent authority. I do wear one occasionally but I like to avoid it, if possible. When one is found on my person, I want it to be black or skin tone. I hate white bras.

Right before you were born, I decided I should probably get a nursing bra. So, I just went to Target and got whatever they had. Unfortunately, they only had a white one in my size. I hate white bras! I got it anyway, because I was too lazy to go anywhere else.

When my Mom, (your Grandma) was visiting after you were born, I was complaining about this white bra. I was also suffering from hemorrhoids at the time. (Yes, this is an important detail. I suffered so much bringing you into the world!) She was making me a big pot of sitz bath tea to soak my sore nether regions, when she got the inspired idea of dying the bra in the tea to attempt to get a skin tone. So we did.



It sort of worked. So I'm sitting here, nursing you now, with a tie dyed looking, brownish-orangish bra. Oh well, its not white. Keeping this in mind, please don't expect to be getting any fancy underwear until you can get it yourself.